i am just a fool in love with another fool :]

Today not a very special day nor exciting
day but just wanna update my blog.

Went to KLCC with mummy today.
Its been a long time since we've both
went shopping.
Bought jackets from Zara and Giordano.
Underwear from TopShop :D
Kinda upset cause the Elmo underwear i saw last
month isnt there anymore.
Now its all superheros -_-.

Even Zara t-shirts are supergirl
and spider girl? lols?

Omg i hateeee my mum T_T
She passed by Coach, not only did she passed by
but she went in, looked for the bag
i loved and wanted, and said
'Do you want it?'.
*Ofcourse i want it! who the hell doesnt want a
coach bag?*
'NO' i said.

Sighhhhhhhhhs.
I hate it when things turns out this way T_T.

But i really appreciate the clothes she bought
for me :]
Its been long since she last bought
clothes for me.

*In the morning, had a bad hair day.
decided to tie my hair up.
Taken before baby called me :]

*With my hair down, messy -_-.
After i got home, decided to try on
my jackets.

Bii said he had a surprise for me.
I asked him
'Need to deliver to my house?'
'No.'
'On facebook?'
'Nothing to do with online'.

While we were talking on the phone
i was frying some rice hahaha.
Which ofcourse as usual, i accidenly
spilled some out, i dont know how.

Obviously bii wouldnt tell me what the surprise is.
Some how i said
'Since the surprise is tomorrow meaning there
is no surprise at all since its April fool'
*Silents. He laughed*
'How did you know!!' he asked.
Hahahahah!
I am so smart!

But the stupidest thing i did was to say
'I wanted to fool you about breaking up
tomorrow but since you know its
april fool i cant do it anymore'
The surprising thing?
He wanted to do the same, and both of
us thought about this idea months ago.

Epic so failed.

Then i was talking, he wasnt listening.
'I want to break up, you always dont listen to what
i say, i am fed up.'
And he was saying pls pls pls and i said
'Does it look like i am joking with you?'

I was sooooooooo sure i almost got him
until i accidently said
'I am serious BII'
I was praying that he didnt hear that.
'What did you said? You called me bii just now'
And he started laughing. When i heard him
laugh i couldnt help but laugh with him.
And i cant put on my serious tone of voice.

EPIC FAILED!

My baby 'nah' and 'pui' me.
He is just mad just cause i found out his surprise :p
There is always next year bii :p

I was reading astrology yesterday~
About capricorn(bii) and pisces(me).

Its hard to believe but i was so right all along.
As to how and why we are together.
Opposite attracts :]
Pisces is a dreamer whereas Capricorn is a realist.

The zodiac match of a Capricorn man and a Pisces woman
has all it takes to lead to long-term compatibility.
His strong personality will be the perfect support
for her fragile, vulnerable self.

He will make her feel secured and in time,
she will also help him come out of his shell
and express his emotions.
She will never ever try to dominate him
and will be like the wife who stands behind her husband,
as he conquers the whole world.

The relationship shows the highest rate
in the compatibility love chart.

Simply meant to be :]

Happy April Fools to you guys :D

You always know how to make me laugh.
Call me meatball again and i'll call you
'pai guat'.
You know breaking up is impossible :]
No one can believe how loyal and faithful i've
become. I used to flirt all day but after i met you,
i distant myself from guys. And i found myself
so in love with you. I was never like this.

7monthsary coming up :]

its time to forget and move on.

Bii, whatever you did in the past
is the past.
And whatever you did i have forgiven you.
But sometimes there are just pains that
you cant heal.
Infact time doesnt heal, we are just learning
how to live and deal with the pain.

There is no need to do anything special for me
as a forgiveness.
Because how we were in the past i truly
understand which is why i didnt blame
you but myself.

But then again, if that incident didnt happened,
would you realized whom you wanted?
would you realized how hard it is
to let a important person go?
And would you realized that it was me?
So therefore we should be thankful too.

I wasnt angry at you bii.
And i know those words i said were harsh.
Sometimes we have to punish those who misbehave
so they'll know what they did was wrong. ;D
I am sorry for saying words i shouldnt have said,
and words that hurt you. :(

Infact since everything is the past, just
broken down memories,
you dont have to feel guilty anymore.

No matter how many times that crappy incident might
haunt me from time to time,
it doesnt mean i will leave you and give up on you.

Those tears i've cried, the pain that i've
gone through, the time i've waited,
it wasnt in vain. But it was all worth it.

Those spaces in between my fingers wasnt
there for no reason.
It was there all along just waiting for the right
person to fill them in.
And yours fits perfectly.
I am sure our hand is joined up for a purpose.
The purpose of love.

I know how hard you have to work each day,
and how much problems you have on
your mind.

Which is why at the end of the day,
on the phone with you,
I would just say anything to make you laugh.
Acting like a child, with my stupid imaginations,
thats how i got the name 'Soh Bii' from you.
Being able to hear you laugh is enough to brighten my day.

Seeing you working so hard, i tell myself
i have to work harder too if i want
to get into college with you.
But from time to time i might have to trouble you.
As you know i am a super troublesome girl x]

That wasnt our 1st argument yet bii.
Now that you know how harsh my words can be
when i am in a not-so-good-mood,
please distance yourself away from me when
that happens again. I dont want it
to affect you.

2.42am. The phone call is still on,
the time is still ticking away,
and your sleeping.
I can hear your breathing and just realized
i've existed in another day of yours
and starting a new day with you in a few hours time.

You may have live in the world 3yrs without me,
but i've never live in the world without you.
We may have probably passed by each other
millions of times.
Never noticing each other.
But after 17yrs of my life, you found me.

And you changed my life,
my personality, my everything.
So you see, you play a damn important role in
my life.
Is it possible to live without you now? :]

And i was jk about updating my blog for me bii.
You have enough things to do at work already :]

Mother-in-law aka bii's mummy,
texted me asking me a question.
Surprisingly i answered it correctly,
i love having great memory.

After few messages later we said our goodnights
and she said she love me :]
I got this warm feeling from her :]
Texted her back saying 'i love you too'.
Feeling blessed to be loved by them.

he made my life better than fairytales.

Walaoeh~
I dont know what happened to me in the morning!
Contact lens put on, take out, change.
Repeating it for 10mins.
After that make up, 1st time screwed up.
Removed it, removed lens, washed face
and redo again.
Sucks again, repeated the same process and redo
again without contact lens as my eyes
were hurting.

Not used to seeing myself without lenses.
Removed again.
I decided to give my eyes some rest as my eye lids
were hurting already. So i went out
without make up.

Met up with bii later.
He kept laughing at me for looking like a kid
without make up >_<.
Keep calling me little girl!

So i decided to go to the washroom
and get my make up done.
Bii was kinda shocked to know how much
make up can change a girl's appearance.
He kept asking me 'how did ur eyes get so big suddenly'
I dont know but it just did >_<.

But he likes me without make up.
*So he can call me little girl*
He says i am like a 2 different person.
One innocent and kiddish look.
Another one is mature and i-dont-know xD

He put his arms around my shoulder
and i was playing with his fingers, guess what he did?
Points middle finger at me.
Points back middle finger at him.
'Fuck you' he said to me.
I forgot what i said back to him.
'You are suppose to say fuck me when i said fuck you' said my bf.
'Fine, fuck me' said me.
He gives a evilish smile.

6months ago we were
hardly-talk-to-each-other-at-all.
Look at us now.
Pointing middle finger to each other.
Making fun of each other.
And i am very sure we just love to tickle each other.
Because i sure do :p my bii's weakness~
Ngek ngek~ ;D

Oh i almost forgot!
My bii is VAINER than i am!
I thought i am the vain one who is crazy
about camwhoring but hahaha.
My boyfriend is THE vain one who always says
'Because i am leng zai'

Fine, i admit you are.
Which is why i stare at you all the time thinking
how did i get such a good-looking boyfriend.
But i know the answer is
'Because i am leng lui'
Ahahaha xD. I am jk about my answer.

Both of us got drenched in the rain dont ask how.
Hope baby wont get sick.
He have to work, and he doesnt have medicine with him :(
Take care of yourself bii.

When i got home my brother asked for his PSP.
Him: My psp give me.
Me: Oh shit i forgot to take it back from him.

Opens my bag just gave him his phone battery
and closed my bag.
*To act like as tho i really dont have it with my
damn-i-am-gonna-die expression on my face*
His face expression changed drastically like as if he
was about to eat me alive.

Him: Fuck you la, i told you many times already and you
still forget !!!!
Took out the PSP and threw it next to him.
Me: Damn no fun one la you.
He tries not to laugh. But ended up laughing.
GOTCHA xD

Because of going to Taiwan on the 6th.
I made my friend postponed his entry for his
hair competition.
Yup i am his model :D
19th getting my hair done.
22nd photo shooting. Hope he wins it :]

Oh i almost forgot again.
I just wanna say 'Go Fuck Yourself' to someone :]
I wont say who but i am sure you know who you are
if you still do read my blog.
And how many times must i tell you to check
the word CHEAP before you use it on someone?
Know why i ignored you instead of shouting back?
Because this is an act of HIGHLY EDUCATED person.

And what you did was LOWLY EDUCATED which makes
you cheaper than what you already are and that
my dear just made me worth 100 times than what
i was before. So thank you :]
..l.. a little gift for you. hope you like it. :D

2.17am. Time for bed.
Have to call baby to wake up at 7am.

Can you feel the magic in the air?
It must have been the way you kissed me.
Fortunate isnt measure by money, but by
how much blessing and love you get
from your other half :]

goodbye coach, hello new watch.

*I miss youu

Morning went to Lot10 with my mum,
brother and cousin sister.
my brother and i went to Sg wang to collect
shampoos and stuffs.And he went to look for his friends. I sat
and wait -_-.

Went to Pavilion after awhile.
My mum kept asking if i wanted the Coach bag.
I have no choice but to say no.
Sometimes just because we love something doesnt
mean we have to get it.
Ahhh, so long and goodbye my love coach bag T~T.

But my mum kept saying why dont i want
anything anymore.
Why am i refusing things from her already.
Sometimes we all have to control our desires mummy.
Understand me. Like how i understand you.

Its always like this.
Whenever you buy something for me we end
up having mini argument.
But whatever you choose and buy for me,
i will always appreciate it much.
Especially at times like this.

*With the watccchhh.
Ellesse brand. At the price of RM400.

I still find it hard to believe i said NO to a branded bag.
Coach. A coach bag. Limited edition some more.
Applause for me please.
My brother said buy now think later.
I am not you kor!
Proves that i am not greeeeedy!
Gosh my heart hurts T~T coach bag sayonara~

Everyday i am saying coach coach coach.
I must have really loved it.
Unbelievable. haha.

Havent walked for so long.
My feet hurts. :(
When i go taiwan its gonna be early in the morning
walk till the next morning.
Meaning 1 or 2am T~T.

Empty stomach.
Except bread in the late afternoon.
Bii is gonna kill me if he knows T~T.
Shh~ Might as well let him read it from here >_<.
He wants me meaty meaty but i dont want T~T.

On the phone moments ago he asked from
the 1st day i met him till now how much weight have i lost.
Actually i am not so sure but i think between 5-10kg.
He said he loved me better when i was fatter.
I still am fat bii!!
Okay so i decided to see my 6mths ago picture and now.

*6mths ago.*

*December 2009*

*28 March 2010*

See not alot right?
Okay fine maybe its alot.
*Look at my face shape*
I am sorry biii !! >_<
Maybe being fatter than my boyfriend is not my thing.

*But see i am still chubby x]
Everyone loves pinching my cheeks T~T

Bii sent me a message saying
'Imagine, next time my baby cutting our son
or daughter hair and they keep complaining bout their
mummy. Isnt it so great? =)'

After reading it, i get this very warm feeling.
The warm-ness of thinking about
our very own family in the future.
A happy one with smiles, laughter and maybe
kids with tears after scolding them.

I am already thinking of my future family
at the age of 18 where most teenage would just
think where and how to have fun.

I must be seriously in love.
Knowing he is the one for me.
Knowing he is the perfect man for me.

The search for my future husband is over.
You are the one i only need.
1.17am. waking up at 8am later.
And i'll see you in the afternoon.
Gosh the excited feelings fills me up again.
I love you bii.

1 week without baby = gg.com

Yesterday night before going to bed i dont
know why i had this weird feeling in me.
The feeling that is so i-dont-know-how-to-explain.
Its like the feeling of fear of losing someone i love.
The fear of losing someone so damn important to me.

It was so hard for me to fall asleep.
But because of my headache somehow i did.
But bii called afterwards.
And i could hardly talk because i was still
struggling to get out of dreamland.

Today woke up feeling crappy.
Why? Ughh. I got my time of the month
yesterday but the pain started today.
omfg -_- hate waking up in the morning with pains.

Went out, came back home.
Bii called. Had our conversation till 7+
and i did my exercise for 2hrs.
I know i know, we are not suppose to exercise while
having period but i cant help it -_-.

So after a shower, i blew curls
instead of straight ;D
*applause to myself*
it took me almost an hr to finish it.
curling iron only need 10mins -_-.

*Without make up, how classic. -_-
Look at the curls x]*
And yes thats a pimple on my cheek.
Double classic.

*Me and kaka~*

*Both of them caught in the act!
Kissing? my dogs are lesbians omg.

My bii is in love with my petville pet more
than me. :(
He stares at it all the time.
He doesnt even stare at me for more than 1min.
I know i am not pretty to start at but still -_-.

6th of April i am going to Taiwan.
For a week.
omg omg omg omg!
You might all think its a good news for me but infact
its not. I mean its awesome i can finally go back
to my so-called second home but
1week without my baby? 1week?
1week? 1 freaking week?

And no, no phone calls for 1 week!!
OMG WTF!
How am i to survive? how am i to sleep?
How can i let him know that i miss him?
And how do i know if he's not cheating on me when i
am not around ;(
How how and how?

Is it possible to stuff my baby into my luggage? :p
Since he is pretty thin.
Thinner than me o(T~T)o
Which is why i am keeping fit but he keep asking me
to put on more weight which is totally
IMPOSSIBLE~!
You should put on more weight bii. Yes you not me.

Its 2.19am right now and he's
on the phone with me but not talking.
He is sleeping :]
I can hear him breathinggggg.
ehh is that a snore i hear? O_O
Nahhhh its not :( just breathingggggg.
SNORE BII!!

Sighs. I really dont know how the fuck
can i survive without him for 1 week.
I cant even survive without him for maximum
1hr? make it 10mins. nvm make it 1sec.
Yes that is how much i need him.
I've never felt so clingy to a man. never.

Whenever i am going overseas and if i have a bf
i would say 'cheh just a week, i definitely can survive'
look at me now! whining already when i am not gone!!
omg pls dont tell me i might cry when i board the plane -_-.

If he calls before i board the plane i can confirm
i will cry. Especially since i am such a emotional freak.
But obviously i wan to hear his voice before i leave.
or maybe when i am in taiwan, i can steal my mum's
phone and make a quick 5mins call :p
yea i should do that.

Nixon Ng Chia Wen aka Xiao Ser!!
Can you see how much i love, need and miss you? :(
Last night when i said 'I love you, dont leave me'
My tears fell because of my fear of losing you one day.
But i meant it when i said it.

But you keep giving surprises.
I know you expect them back from me but
give me time.
Time to think of one that might make you cry. :p
No matter how many times or whoever said
' i love you more than you love me '
we both know we are just loving each other with
much more than what we have and could possibly love.

I'll be back before you know it hubby.
With your clothes, mother-in-law's gifts, and so much more.
Just make sure you dont fool around when i am not here ;(
But i know and trust you wont. :]

Why oh why do i still get all excited and girlish with
those heart beating crazily feeling when i miss you?
You said you dislike me for being 'too perfect'.
I know i'll find the REAL answer one day.
We are a perfect match.
A match made not in heaven but a place
much greater than that.
My fate and your fate, are combined as one now.

endless surprises x]

Yesterday bii said he will give me surprise.
But ofcourse its something i never expected.
Especially not on facebook -_-.

He called me all of a sudden in the morning and
asked if i would be home at around 1pm.
I said i wasnt sure as i was going to go out soon and asked
him why. He said he have a surprise for me
and he wants to deliver it to my house.

I said you can deliver it to my house as my
grandparents will be home to help me
accept it. He said he wants me to receive it by
my own hands so change day.

The whole day i kept asking him what the surprise
was and he kept saying no he wont tell me.
Obviously no one would but i get very impatient
when it comes to surprises.

He smsed me and gave me 3 clues.
1st clue: Related to ur daily DIY job.
*pls dont think dirty things -_-v*
2nd clue: can see cannot eat.
3rd clue: Flying without wings.

I kept thinking and thinking and thinking
but i cannot think what it is.
And he texted me later saying he was drunk.
I wanted to use that chance to get him to tell me :p
But failed! ish T_T

But after he asked me to login facebook
and opened petville
this is what i saw.

*Aiks ~ Damn pretty~

*Alice in wonderland*

*Kiss my baby!*

He always gives me unexpected and
all of a sudden surprises.
Gosh. what else surprise is there to come?

This afternoon, i was in great eastern mall.
My mum was having tea with her friend,
and bii smsed me saying he needs to hear my voice badly.
My excuse, was to go MPH bookstore =_=v
and called him.

I saw this book titled
'Man wants sex, Woman needs love'
ahaha xD so true.

After i walked back to my mum,
her eyes were teary and she said
one of my friend's
*whom mother is also her close friend*
father passed away.

And my brother was like
'why are you guys making a big deal out of it'

i told him.
'You never lost a friend once so therefore
you will never know how one is going thru.
if one day one of ur friend is gone, dont blame
me for laughing for the words you said today.'

Sometimes you really need to watch ur words.
I dont want give u another slap.
You should know my temper when i am pissed.

Fuckkk. my head hurts like a bitch.
Medicine? does not word.
ahhh. eff it. who cares.
Happens all the time x]

Its unbelievable how much one person can change
when they are in love.
Deeply amazing.
Maybe love really can conquer everything?
Who knows?
Baby, I DO appreciate you. :]

motivating myself to lose 10kg haha.

Yesterday shitty shitty day.

During the afternoon time i got bad news
and my brother got involved in a car accident.

Thank god he was fine but the car wasnt.
I dont have his car photo and i dont
wanna ask from him >_<.

Went to the police station to make a report.
Walaoeh~ waited for 4hours.
Some more i waited in the car T_T
cause my mum brought one of my dog out >_<.
It started raining heavily.
Thunder boom here boom there T_T.

And the wind current walaoeh >_< damn strong!
i watched all the rubbish bin outside
being blown away whee~
and the car really felt like it could be blown away any min~
its was moving sideways. to be honest i was abit afraid -_-v

bii called me. Thank god he did T_T
If not i might die of boredom T_T.
The car was cold even after the aircon was off.

*my random photography shot 1.

*Random photography shot 2.

*Feels so emo >_<

*Emo-inggggg

* toy poodle miki~

Around 9pm+ i finally reached home.
I never missed my room so much T_T.

This morning called bii at 8am to wake him up
for work. But he kept sleeping back.
After 20mins he finally woke up.

Took 2 of my dogs out to pet saloon.
They finally got a haircut!
But kaka look like a guy already T_T ish.

*Hugo in the car. busy body looking behind

*my kaka. you see so ugly already T_T

* But i still love her.

This afternoon, my mum and her friend was
having a tea.
I kept quiet whenever her friend is around.
So he thought i am that emo emo type girl with
super negative thinking.

Then he started telling my mum that i am only
18 and i shouldnt be affected so much
with her problems, i should go have fun.
And many many other things.

But once i started talking to him i said
'I am not negative or neither am i emo.
I just like having my mind drifting somewhere else.
Just because i dont smile at all times doesnt mean
i am sad or whatever.
Yesterday my brother and mother was down but
i was happily chatting with my bf on the phone.
No matter how worst things can get i believe in
one sentence my whole life.
'Everything has a good side''

His eyes were widen.
He said 'thats the kind of girl i never expect from you.
a 18 and so mature. keep it up. i like it.'

People usually dont expect me to have
such mature thinking.
I dont know why. Maybe they think at the
age of 18 all teenage wants is just to have fun?

I am not all about having fun at all.
I am all about success and money-making.
Because i realize without these, its not easy to survive.
And i dont like or want to rely on a man
to take care of me and i just stay home and be a
house wife. Thats not my style.

I am independent, strong and i believe i can be smart.
My bii calls me tou fu. Meaning soft/weak.
I am going to prove it to him i am not.
He is the tou fu :p

its only 10.41pm why am i sleepy alreadyyy?
Diet diet diet.
Dont wan be meaty meaty~
dont want to have fats for bii to pinch ;3

you keep me breathing.

8am. My alarm ring. Ughh i hate the
sound of alarm ringing.
Called bii to wake him up.
He answered my call and said 'bii i call u back later'

At 11am+ he still havent call back.
I kinda knew he is still sleeping. =_=
i called and called and called until he finally
called back.
But i was already at TS when he called.

Went to find Ikki to pass my time.
Suddenly someone came in.
Sei ah wen. a guy i met from sdo but havent
seen him for a super long time.
At 1st he didnt see me, me and ikki was just waiting for his
reaction when his eyes sees me.
Ah Wen => 'ehhhhhhhhhh !!' *eyes widen*
Ikki and me => AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

After awhile bii called and ask me to buy
movie ticket 1st.
I asked ikki to come out with me :pp
He closed the shop and walked me to the cinema floors.

3rd floor. Long line.
1st floor no line hahaha.
Bought 'Just another pandora box' premiere class.

Bii reached, went to look for him.
Said my bye to Ikki.
And we entered the cinema.

He said he got a gift for me and i said okay give it.
He insisted that i give him my bag 1st
so he can put it in without showing anyone.
I said 'your underwear?'
he said 'yea how did you know'
I said it doesnt matter since its a underwear.
Everyone wears one :p

But in the end he gave it to me.
A snake! hahahaha.
He said he had it for 5yrs more or less and its
super important to him.
If i lose it he would say goodbye to me for real.

Bii drank beer!
during the movie he put the bottle to my lips!
I will never ever touch alcohol as i have super
low alcohol tolerance T_T.
The movie, funny funny funny :D

After the movie went to Wendy's burger.
I ate Caesar Salad. Ishhh yummy! xD
Bii ate big burger O_O and his face turned
pink from the hotness.
His face always turn pinkish red.
Maybe he is just shy being around me? :p
*I am jk bii >_<*

Went to sg wang. bii went shopping.
He swallowed his chewing gum while trying clothes.
omg ahahahah .

7pm+ mum picked me up.
On our way home she said 'I bought chocolates for
you, its in your room'
I thought it was the macadamia
chocolates that i mad love.

Reached home. Entered my room.
A pink box which looked like
a gift box on my bed.
Opened it. OMG WHY IS IT SO CUTE?
how am i gonna eat it now? T_T

*Isetan 20th Anniversary :]*

*Ish cute dou sei.*

*Especially this one! Look at the vintage design on it.
I definitely wont be able to eat this at all*

Bii called and we started chatting, he said
bring it out next week and he'll help me eat it all -_-.
The phone died off on its on and he didnt
called back probably he was busy.

My brother came in i showed him the chocolates.
His hands were reaching out for it.
EAT SHIT KOR!
dont touch my chocolates !

I was sleeping on my bed with the camera in my hand.
My brother came in again and said
'Stop taking breast shots of youself'
I replied 'I got no boobs so how can i take boobs shots?'
He laughs. Meaning good point.
Well thanks for laughing you fat thing!

*Bii's snake.*

*Camwhoring pic no2*

Bii keep asking me to put on weight.
So there is fats for him to pinch.
I dont want!
DIET DIET DIET!~

12.59am. Help bii with his fb apps,
do accounting for today and off to bed.
Nights~~

Dream will always be dream.
No matter how real they feel its just a dream.
Even if it does happens i would probably laugh if off
together with you.
You are the best thing that happened to me.
Why should i leave you?
I love you lover boy.
And my hair is mine :p

Eenie Meenie~

*I kinda miss this fringe of mine :(
I wasnt wearing any contact lens here. I am thinking
of stopping contact lenses.
Some say i look better with this fringe.
But some say i look better with the fringe
i am having now.
Gosh i dont know :( but i am fed up of the fringe
i am having at the moment tho.
Have to pin it up every single dayyyy.

Some say i look like a kid with the old fringe
and others says i look mature with the one i am having
at the moment.
Ish i hate my hair -_-.

Anyways, last night i could barely sleep a wink.
I had this weird and not very scary but
enough to keep me awake nightmare the night before.
Its about this stupid ghost movie i watched
before and in my dream i was involved.
Gosh >_<.

So bii called me as usual.
I was super super sleepy but whenever i close
my eyes i just want to open them back quickly.
And i didnt even off the lights -_-.

He said he could life me up thru the phone.
I asked how.
He said thru the power of love.
I sort of knew he was jk with me.
But since he is so DEMANDING i followed his instructions.
He asked me to stand up and i did.
He then asked me 'Do you love me?'
I obviously answered 'Yes i do'.
Then he said to jump.

Then i knew he was jk with me -_-.
He said he did lift me up cause he told
me to jump.

So chatting with bii.
And he knew i cant sleep because of my
stupid nightmares.
It was 1am+ and i knew he wanted to go to bed.
I told him to go and sleep, dont worry about me.
He said 'i wan to protect my baobei'

And he fell asleep.
I did fall asleep for awhile but woke up
awhile and my phone was on loud speaker
*yup we didnt hang up*
and i heard something, heavy breathing and followed
by......... SNORING SOUNDS!
Bwahahahaha!~

My bii bii snored!! ahahaha~
I thought i heard it wrongly but then
he said 'biiiii' and i said 'ennn'
then the snoring sound continued.
And i was wondering when he said bii was he awake
or was he sleep talking ? >_<
I cant help but smile. and think to myself
'How did this man even became mine. How and why
did he fall so in love with me. How did i fall
so crazy in love with him'

I cant find the answer. But maybe one day
i might :]

I am thinking of not wearing contact lenses anymore.
But without contact lenses my eyes wouldnt
look as sexy as it is now xD haha.
*you can refer to my picture above with other pictures*
Plus facebook posted this video
that those online contact lenses that we always buy from
can cause blindness.

I am sure none of us want that right?

I am so addicted to Sean Kingston feat Justin bieber-
Eenie Meenie.
But when justin started singing he sounded like
a girl omgggggggg.
Well cant blame him. Not fully reach puberty yet :pp

I am guessing i might be able to get some sleep
tonight. *hopefully*
Nights guys. :]

Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova~
Baby, i am ur eenie meenie miney mo lover ;p
Gosh i love you so much!*

i am such a clumsy freak.

See the dragon pottery above? :D
My mum found it back~
I made this in school when i was 7 or 8?
Dont really remember but its adorable isnt it? :P
The colours kinda sucks tho.
Cheap paints school provides hahaha.

Woke up this morning with a very very weird dream.
I dont really quite remember.
I dont know why i have been having weird
dreams lately but when i wake up i only
have slight memory of it.
Its kinda like a nightmare but not a very scary one.

And i find myself waking up at 6am.
i dont know why but i just jump up at that time.

Anyways, i was getting ready to go with my mum,
brother and cousin.
Was getting my make up done.
But oh-my-fucking-gosh i dropped my
kate dual carat eye shadow!!
Before i picked it up i was praying
'pls pls pls let it be nothing. pls tell me the powder
didnt shatter'
Picked it up. The colour i use all the time is officially gone.
Why not the other one -_-.

Sighs, time to get a new one.
Hopefully they still have this stock -_-.

*Rip my dear eye shadow T_T*

Why am i such a clumsy freak!
Gosh i hate this clumsiness in me. What to do?

*My super super obedient dog~*

I have friends asking me
how do i always find the energy to dance
even when i dont have enough rest.
*you idiots forgotten what i have thought you -_-*

Well the answer is super simple.
1st- Dancing is my passion, hobby and life. Although
i wasnt suppose to dance anymore i force myself
and my body. That is how much i would sacrifice for it.
Although my dance steps are very limited due to my body
it doesnt stops me from trying.

2nd- I always pretend i am on STAGE. yes stage.
People gets stage fright. But me? I feel thats where i belong.
So whenever i am infront of my mirror, i close my eyes,
pretending i am on stage.

3rd. Dance like nobody is watching. Just go crazy and
all over the place. Shake what ur mama gave u :p

4th- ENERGY PEOPLE! *i miss shouting this 2 words to
those i teach hahaha*
When you put all ur energy in ur move, you see a big
difference in you. And that's where you'll get more
confidence.

5th- Just have fun. Make up your own steps as you dance.
Just freestyle! that is what dancing is all about.

I remember whenever i perform.
My face expressions is always smiling,
winking at the audience, giving those surprises looks.
And people just love it :]
Whenever i finish performing people would say
'you are a freak on stage girl!'
Haha i know i am ;]
Even in my dance classes, during our 10mins break,
I would check my teacher's bag for songs.
Changed it and start freestyle-ing.

Students would just watch, but they dont dare
to do it.
I asked 'why not?' they said 'we suck, we are not
as good and as confident as you'.
Ridiculous answer. Anyone can do it.
Whenever the teacher comes in, he wont stop the song.
He would join me and we would start
dirty dancing. Even when classes ends, we stayed and
continue. And he would teach me whenever i am
not doing a step right :]

So yea, its all about how much you love it.
I dont dance daily for losing weight.
But i dance to satisfy my hunger for my hobby.
Especially when you dance so hard as the sweats just
fall down your spines, you will feel satisfied with yourself.

But i've stopped for 1yr+ due to busy-ness.
Just started back in the middle of last year.
At 1st i felt like a grandma -_-
My body was hurting and i wasnt as flexible as before.
Haha, but even now i dont have much time for it.
Study, study and study.
From morning till night.

If i wan to get into college,
Its all about hardwork and not fun anymore :]
And i'm willing to sacrifice my passion for my future.
When you love something, you just got to set it free.

From here onward, its all about HARDWORK.
Study, be a good daughter, be a good girlfriend.
I wont disappoint anyone anymore.

This is another side of me waiting
to reveal itself.

I should stop falling asleep whenever you call
dammit >_<. Since when have i became such a pig.

I'm sorry.

Started the day with a bad bad afternoon.
My brother sent me out and my mum called.
Bili bala on the phone and i suddenly
lost my temper and said some words i shouldnt have.

Reached Timesquare.
Went to find Ikki awhile.
He saw my eyes red and he knew i cried.
I told him my situation and suddenly bii called.
Ikki walked with me to meet my bii.

Told bii my problems.
He should know better cause my mum called him -_-.
Whenever i do something wrong my mum sure
calls my boyfriend.

And bii wanna talk talk talk.
I kept quiet because i know the moment i start
talking my tears would fall again and i dont want that.

And he said 'please apologize to ur mum
when you get back' over and over again from
time to time.
You dont have to tell me bii!! -_-.

We went to lunch at teppanyaki.
And bii told me to buy something for my mum
as an apology.
Godiva chocolate is in pavilion and we were
so lazy to walk over.
Thank god there was japanese fair in timesquare.
So bought few things from there. Everything
that my mum likes.

Every Sunday, there will be a time where
bii will take a packet of cigarettes to smoke.
And i dont allow him to smoke so i kinda
took it away from him.
And obviously he'll try to snatch it back.
But today he cheated. He knew my weak points now :(
By tickling me. ish i hate that weakness of mine.

Bii i am sorry but i guess i really cant forgive
for what you did 3mths ago.
I tried and i tried but i guess when you are
hurt deeply by the one you truly love and would
just cry every day and night knowing
things isnt right but yet you keep hanging on not
giving up.

Although i know that its me you want, love and need.
But the hurt is here to stay.
My ex did it once but i didnt care. But i know its you
i am so afraid of losing and the one i freaking heart so much.
So i guess this has turned into a scar.

After my mum picked me up.
We went to Imbi to eat bak ku teh~
Bii bii's favorite wahahaha~

Reached home, threw myself on my bed.
My mind was blank, i didnt wanna think of
any complicated things at night.
Neither did i wanna cry.
Yes i am a cry baby :p but crying is a easiest
way to tear a guy's heart.

Yesterday bii wanted to scold me on the phone.
But because i was crying so he didnt~
wahahaha~~~

*Kaka didnt wanna look at the camera :(*

*Lui lui admiring my face :p*

*look at her sleepy face x]*

*Kisses for her. mwarks~*


Anyways.
I want to apologize to my bii for causing
him troubles.
I will 'try' to stay out of trouble. :p
And i love how i can disturb you when you wanna
night night~~~ ;p
And yes, you turned my frown upside down as usual :]
You know you always will.
Which is why i love you.
And no you are NOT a substitute!! -_-.

*wink wink :p*

Alrighty then, i guess that's all for tonight x]
Time for me to cuddle with my
blankets and doggies in bed <3 style="text-align: center;">You cant cuddle with me in bed bii :p

Why did the 3rd time felt so different?
My heart skipped a beat.
Your face expression was different too >_<
I guess thats how passionate feels like.
I freaking love you so freaking much.
Its always like this, the moment you leave
i start missing you the next second.

bitchy mode on.

Today went to KLCC with bii :]
Reached there a little earlier than him so
went to the cinema to get movie tickets 1st.
Omg freaking packed -_-.
Thank god there is an express lane for
Alice in Wonderland. x]
So got the tickets, he reached and we went for brunch.

While walking bii looked at me and asked
'Why is so many girls looking at you? usually
they look at me now they are all looking at you'
Because, i am gorgeous xD
And you asked 'are you even pretty?'
If i wasnt, would i have attracted you? xD
Nobody falls in love with personality at 1st sight.

It was such a bad time to have brunch.
At a time where every food court or restoran is packed.
He kept complaining just cause he was hungry.
Complaining doesnt solve ur hungryness bii -_-.
So in the end we went to the manhanttan fish market.

On our way, i heard someone shouting my name.
Infront of me, i couldnt believe my eyes.
It was Julia. A friend from school.
I remember the last time we talked was the day before
she left to France and we argued. Till then we never spoke again.
It was a little weird, even though we known each other
for 13yrs, we became strangers.
I hated that feeling, the fakeness in our conversation.

After brunch bii and i walked over to the
education fair :]
I thought it would be like super pack but i was wrong.

Bii left me alone to ask about colleges information.
As soon as he left i was like errr but a dude
quickly walked over to me and said
'hi miss can i help you?'
I caught him looking at me from a distance quite a few times.
I guess he got his chance to talk to me ;D
And you have no idea how close he was standing next to me hahaha.

So after that i walked over to Segi college stand.
A girl came over to me and asked if i needed help.
She answered to all of my questions but after that
she asked if i did my hair myself -_-.
And blah blah we got off the college conversation and she
asked for my facebook hahaha. I knew
instantly she just wanted to be friends with me :]

So after that bii said he got a surprise treasure hunt
for me today. I got all excited that i barely
sleep a wink last night and guess what it was?
'treasure hunting in a bookstore'
how awesome is that? very. hahaha.

Almost 5pm time for our movie yay!
Alice in wonderland x]
by Tim burton my favvvvve director of all times.
Ofcourse as expected from Tim burton everything
in it was darm and gloomy x]

*The madhatter played by Johnny Depp. My
idol <3*>

*The cheshire cat. mad love it. So freaking adorable!
especially when it smiles hahaha.*

And i simply adore mad hatter make up. It
changes due to his mood x]
And anne hathaway played as the white queen x]
The way she have to act was hilarious.

So after the movie, mum called and said she'll
be picking me up a little later.
So bii and i went to have dinner.
He asked me to buy food for him but i didnt know what
he wants and whenever i dont do something he will
always say 'everyday i have to work and be all tired
and i just wanna relax now blah blah'
trying to make me feel guilty. But still he bought it himself x]

I said i didnt want dinner and he bought for me too.
My appetite has grown smaller lately.
And it was a great way for me to lose weight without trying -_-v.
Its like one min bii said 'dont lose weight' to me and the
next min he wanna says 'god you are so fat' and i am like '...'
what the hell am i suppose to do with my size?
some say 'we love you the way you are, you look great this way'
and now one wanna say 'god you are so fat'.

Mind you, fat is beautiful.
And i am sorry for not dressing up so 'lady-like'.
I prefer something comfortable.

Its like a quote i heard from a movie called
the ugly truth.
'There is nothing wrong with dressing simple except
no one wants to fuck that'.
That is so true.

And today bii wanna bili bala me just cause
my t-shirt is short and my pants
keep falling showing off my ass crack.
ahem i cant control my pants. plus you cant blame
me for losing weight due to my sickness.
This pants never used to fall this way.
Sasa had a sales, he wanted to buy things for me
but i didnt want as i got nothing i need.
He said my perfume stinks. fine i wont touch it anymore.
I'll save money and buy DKNY be delicious perfume.

Yea noticed how many complains he makes about me?
mmhmm, one word, demanding.
He wanna makes so many complains, then why still
keep me by your side?
love me for who i am thats all i can say.

I cant satisfy everyone desires all at one time!!
Gosh i am in such a bitchy mode right now.
And i just realized, i have been satisfying everyone desires
that i barely know what i want.
How i want to dress, talk, walk, everything i dont know!
Whats my point of living anyways?

*home with his jacket*

Yes i wore his jacket home. I suggested since he have such
a big issue with my butt crack, why not take
off his jacket, give it to me to wear it
so its long enough to cover up my butt and he did.
I didnt wanna give it back. ahahah.

Freaking-ish tired.
I hate the feeling of trying so hard to look good
and this and that and that person
just have to complain and shit.

Just when i thought i found someone who wouldnt
be so i-dont-know-how-to-explain

but boy was i so wrong.
My theory has been proven.
Guys does care about looks not matter how they say they dont.
I thought it was only my ex. who nags and makes
me doll up all the time. I was wrong.
No guys would like girls dressed in t-shirt and shorts with
a pair of simple heels as its not lady-like at all.

This post is getting prettyyy long.
Goodnight.

This was me? omgosh. part 1.

Aiks omgosh!
I found old shocking pictures!
Just wanted to share them x]

*Lian, me , clarissa and meagan*

I remembered this was taken on my bday.
I forgot which year but yea.

*On our way to Sunway*

*Me, Julia and Lian. I think it was
Julia who drew that star on me -_-*

*Skipping classes to so called practice
our salsa dance*

*Group photo! :D I miss you guys :(*

*Me, Lian, Jia Lin*
My very last year of cheerleading, After
they announced us as winners we jumped,
screamed and cried.
Shit, i miss those feelings so much.
And i lost my medals! omg -_-.

*Changed out of our cheerleading uniform.
Clarissa, Lian, me and Julia*

*Johan, Lian, me and Julia.
Farewell party to Lian in her house*

Lian and i went to Singapore when
she came back from Minnesota.
Gosh, unforgettable memories :]

The pictures below made me laughed out
loud. It was this costume thingy we did.
hahahaha, i remembered it was freaking hot.

*omg hahahah*

*This very much explains our friendship*

*Look at her -_-*

*Hahahahaha!! she hit me!
i burst out laughing when i saw this*


Oh yes~ All of those was me.
Looks fat?
My eyes looks small?

Well believe the unbelievable x]
I will try to dig out more old photos
to share with you all.
Until then~ nights~